Wednesday, June 12, 2013

Eight ways to keep love alive when you work as cabin crew

It’s well known that flight attendants jetting around the world often struggle to maintain long-term relationships with partners at home. Whatever your relationship status; whether you’re committed, single, or casually dating, everyone has preconceived ideas about what a relationship should be like, and how it should work.

So what can help keep love alive? We posted this question on the Cabin Crew Facebook page recently, asking you to give us your tips, so here’s the outcome - eight ways to manage your love life while jetting round the world!

Take time to understand what you both want out of the relationship

Unfortunately there is no rule book when it comes to having a successful relationship – every relationship will be different, and the two people involved are likely to have their own unique expectations of what being together means. Emil says: “Start by spending time together working out what is right for you and your partner. This will take some patience, but too many people give up at the first hurdle. So talk about what you both expect, and build the relationship from there.”

Respect each others’ interests

One misconception is that couples must have shared interests. In fact relationship experts say pursuing separate interests can often lead to a very healthy relationship. Yes of course you do need to have some things in common, but if you share all of your interests you could very quickly find that you’re in each other’s pockets all the time which isn’t healthy for anyone. “Remember that if you talk a lot about the amazing places you have visited as cabin crew, you should give equal time listening to details about what your non-cabin crew boyfriend or girlfriend has seen or done recently,” suggests Fenella.

Don’t dwell on your work problems

“Don’t bring the flight home, and don’t bring home to the flight,” says Brayan. This is a valid point, as no matter what your professional life throws at you, it’s not fair to discuss issues endlessly at home. Moaning about your boss, annoying passengers, or the long hours you’ve worked can be a real passion killer. So try to switch into a different way of thinking once you’ve worked your shift, and made it home. It will be better for you too!

Make your time away a plus not a minus

There’s an old saying that applies perfectly to the cabin crew profession: Absence makes the heart grow fonder. So for many flight attendants, short bursts of separation are used to enhance the relationship, rather than damage it. Adam says: “I personally find it’s better for relationships to have time away! You look forward to going away but then can enjoy looking forward to coming home to see your other half!” Some effort is required for this – make your ‘reunions’ interesting, romantic, sexy and fun. That way your other half will always look forward to the moment you return. Gareth says: “The time apart is what keeps my relationship strong. It's nice to have ‘me time’ and also ‘us time’. But work and home are always separate.”

Choose a partner who understands

It might be the case that some individuals just won’t be able to cope with a partner who is constantly working rosters and likely to be away for long periods, missing weekends and working holidays. Jessica says: “If you think they won't be able to handle your work... they probably won't! Figure this out before you commit to the work or the relationship, then decide.” We think this is great advice – you will both be miserable if resentment creeps in.

Don’t screw the crew

This sounds rather blunt, but it’s an important one, and was certainly suggested by a few people on Facebook, who no doubt have seen colleagues mess up their love lives in this way. Although there are ample opportunities to ‘play away’ when you work as a flight attendant, this is a failsafe step towards wrecking a stable relationship at home. If you have someone special, think very carefully before getting involved with someone at work. “It’s highly unprofessional anyway, and getting a bad reputation can really damage your career,” says Susie.

Communicate, communicate, communicate

It’s easy for resentment to creep into any relationship and this could be exacerbated when you work in very different professions. Sheena makes the point that both parties must be equally willing to make the relationship work, and for this talking through issues is vital. “You should have an open communication and if there are misunderstandings you should never let it pass,” she says. ”Instead talk about it and don’t let your pride be the priority! If you’re not willing to talk things over and find ways to compromise “you will find yourself old and loveless!” says Sheena.

Work hard at ‘quality time’

Planning ahead is something cabin crew tend to be good at, or the job will take over personal lives completely. When you know what’s on the roster, make sure you plot time into your diary for trips away with your loved one, so you both have plenty to look forward to. Having tickets for gigs, theatre and festivals is a great idea, or even making sure you enjoy regular meals out or trips to the cinema. ‘Date nights’ at home are good too – as a low budget means of being thoughtful and romantic. Chris says: “My relationship works really well. He flies long haul and I fly short haul. The gods of rostering are always kind to us, and if we go longer periods of not seeing each other it just helps keep the all important flame alight. It can be tough at times but 99% of the time it's easy peasy!”

We hope these snippets of advice are helpful. Please post any other tips that spring to mind and we will add them to the article. Happy flying and happy loving! 

Article taken from

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